Contest Rules

Go back to your 10th grade civics class. This is about the time most of us K-12 scholars came to learn the definition of the term; laissez faire, a noun (lais•sez–faire / le-ˌsā-ˈfer).

Simply put it’s an ideology based in the economic world that says businesses should be able to operate with very little interference from the government.

It’s French in origin (I know, go figure right… a debate in hypocrisy we’ll discuss at another time). Anyway, as it pertains to this exercise, it is of little consequence, why?

Because of the strict set of rules, regulations and guidelines set forth by our elected legislators in Washington (you know them as the ones that are ‘here to help’) that say I MUST follow them to the letter in order to… wait for it…


(This is where I differ from liberal politicians. You see, I give away MY OWN stuff. They steal OUR STUFF and give it away to someone else… who did nothing for it, simply in exchange for that persons (pronounced “Low Information Voter” vote)

Even though I create them, pay for the purchase, printing, fulfillment (shipping and handling) of MY OWN shirts, I still must list the litany of do and don’ts, wills and won’ts, who can who can’t, the list goes on ad-nauseam.

So, to all my BIG GUBMINT lovers out there in blog-land, here you go. The magical list of rules for giving away my own stuff:

I first need to tell you that both of my FREE T-Shirt Give-A-ways are in fact “sweepstakes”.

This is because it’s a promotion where the winner is determined by a chance event and the participants (you) exercise no control over the outcome.

Translation: Sorry, but slipping me a ‘C’ note won’t help you here. What do I look like… a lobbyist?

This sweepstakes is a random drawing that takes place each Friday.

If the promotion involved skill, rather than random chance, it would be considered a contest since a “contest” or “skill contest” refers to a promotion or giveaway, where skill or the ability to perform a required task could determine the winner.

So here are ‘Da Rules’

“No Purchase Necessary” to Enter or Win:

Official Rules: Each promotion must include a set of official rules that identify the material terms and conditions that govern the promotion, and various laws provide that they meet certain requirements.

This is them: I give away 2 (two) free shirts every Friday until I stop giving away 2 free shirts on Friday. I’ll give every subscriber to my newsletter / blog / facebook / twitter ad nauseum, a 30 day notice if and when I decide to stop giving away 2 free t-shirts on Friday.

It is up to the people who ‘unsubscribe’ to my newsletter for any reason, to notify me by mail that they wish to be kept informed of my eventual stoppage of business, my untimely demise at the hand of excessive drink, the proverbial ‘bus’ that everyone’s always talking about being run over by, an unforgiving husband (hey I didn’t know she was married), my winning the POWERBALL or any other state sponsored game of chance, or the inevitable “sailing off into the sunset.”

Advertisements: I may advertise in the following media: print, internet, radio, television, and ghost and dog whispering…etc.).

Winner Releases: Since the retail value falls far below the legal requirement of $600.00 and is neither dangerous or promotes any event no release is needed.

Contracts: Signed contracts. There are none. These are my own shirts and no third party in a capacity of decision making is involved. If that occurs, than each agreement will be spelled out with the third party’s obligations for the promotion and will indemnify my company for a breach of those obligations.

Start and End Dates for All Entry Methods: There are 2 (two) ways to enter the promotion. You may enter by simply entering your first name and email ONE TIME ONLY via the web site or use the united states postal service (if you dare).Because this giveaway is continuous, meaning it goes on week after week after week ad nauseam, no deadline is recognized. To enter by mail, you may mail a 3×5 card to TRTS 2336 SE Ocean Blvd. #174 Stuart FL 34996 attn: T-Shirt Give-A-Way. Include a return snail and email address so as to be notified if your name is drawn in the weekly random drawing.

Since this is an “enter once to be registered for the length of the business life”, this gives each entrant an equal chance at winning. USPS mail and online entries has the exact same odds of winning.

Is there any payment or purchase needed to receive or claim a free t-shirt: NO! No payment, no bribe, no coupon, no gift card… nothing. This giveaway does not require payment by the winner to receive or claim a prize.

Prize Descriptions: it’s a flippin T-Shirt for crying out loud. Coming in a variety of colors and styles, all cotton (I really hate those 50/50 cotton poly blends don’t you)? With printing on the back.

The printing: I use shirts that are made outside the USA because the unions have a stranglehold on the garment industry in America and if you don’t know how I feel about the unions.. Stay tuned kids… you will. Oh yeah, the shirts have a retail value (not including including fulfillment and sales tax) of $19.95

Eligibility: You must be a LEGAL resident of the United States of America, and over the age of 18, period. No one else is eligible to enter.
Winner Selection: each Friday 2 random drawings are held to determine the winners. Each winner will be notified by email unless otherwise instructed or advised by entrant.

Taxes: Each winner is responsible for payment of their own sales tax. Check with your local and state taxing authorities as to the amount to be paid. Check with your tax professional as to where you notate the payment of said taxes on your yearly tax forms.

Yes, you’ll probably notice a lack of my usual ‘smart-assed self’ when talking about taxes. Do you think I want the IRS or any of the rest of the “Government Goon-Squad” coming down on my ass? We already know what the IRS does to conservatives. If Lois Lerner can get away with “losing’ 2 million emails, what in the hell do you think they’ll do to little ole me? Yep, I’ll be hanging with Jimmy Hoffa under Giants stadium.

Record Keeping and Winners Lists: it is required that I keep all promotion entries and winner lists for a minimum of four years from the date the last prize is redeemed. I will. It is also required that I keep all winner documentation for a minimum of four years from the date of prize redemption. I’ll do that too, and provide winners’ lists upon written request for at least six months after the promotion entry period ends.

User-Generated Content Promotions: The giveaway geared to honoring your favorite local talk radio host is also a random drawing. No skill or special verbiage is needed when entering that person’s name. That drawing is held each Friday and is a random drawing.

Good luck!